Fine line
I have definatley gained acceptance over the last few weeks as this being a disease. I seem to have let go of a lot of anger, and disliking my exabf; this is now being replaced with compassion and understanding for him having a disease called alcoholism. But there seems to be a fine line between compassion and still wanting to rescue, at least for me there is.
The only thing is, is that being a codie, I have a hard time finding the "middle ground." Last time I talked to him he was trying SO hard to sound happy that it just made me feel even more sorry for him, he truly did sound pathetic. I almost found myself saying "call me if you ever need to talk." :slaphead I sometimes still feel the need to control and want to "rescue him," which I'm sure is all normal.
How do I find the middle ground and even balance? Even if I don't talk to him, it's still going on in my head; the urge to "rescue." I guess it would have been wrong to say "call me if you need to talk." He has said that a lot the last few times I've talked to him. He seems to really want this "friendship" type of relationship with me all of a sudden, sometimes I think he still cares and knows what I'm going through with my son and all the pain I feel, but yet at the same time, I know he isn't capable of really caring about me. And NO I'm not going to go there with him, my mind is already made up on that one.