Just popping in quickly on my way to work. Wish I had more time.
Sunflower, I’ve read so many times that moving homes is one of the most stressful life challenges and you have looked, found and moved into a new home all while newly sober, no wonder you have some overwhelmed feelings as the stress of all of that affects you. In a big move like that you can totally deplete serotonin levels in a brain that is currently rewiring itself to be sober. Far from anything being wrong with you, your feelings sound 100% natural, of course they are not pleasant, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. As others have said, let yourself feek what you feel, ride that wave of emotion, the bathtub is a much safer place than my chosen moments to have a wee cry which is while waiting at traffic lights!
@Palmer and Numblady - partners eh? I told mine he was in a poisonous mood and hung up on him last night. Now of course comes the awkward ‘make up’ phone call. He and I deal with stress very differently, most of the time I can cheer him out of a difficult mood, but when I am tired sometimes his negativity (not aimed at me, just life in general) can be draining. He’s a lovely man, usually full of fun, but he does have dark moods at times and living apart means the phone is not the easiest way to communicate at those times.
I know ours is an unorthodox relationship anyway, but I do realise he and I are ‘together, but separate’ when it comes to our life journey. I worry about his sons, but parenting them is not my job and while I don’t understand some of his parenting choices they are his to make. It is hard to be with a person and not judge them at times, especially when their choices affect us too.
Sobriety brings many gifts, but the clarity it brings to certain realities in our lives doesn’t take away the challenges.
In other news my partner left a huge chocolate bar behind at the weekend, I ate the whole thing in one evening and now plan to buy another to replace it to hide my ‘crime’ lol