Originally Posted by AprilMay1895
Oh head noise you want, head noise you got. lol Right now it's "April, you are so stressed out this week. Doesn't it seem silly you're forcing this abstinence thing on you this week of all weeks??? You need to relax this weekend and just let it all go. You don't have the kind of personality that succeeds at this stuff anyway, I give you a week until you're back at it." Of course it's saying it in 1st person tho.
Everything you wrote is obvious AV, but the highlighted parts are classic AV, which will always try to conceal the real purpose of drinking/using, which is to get that deep pleasure; feel good all over. You don't drink to relax, to cope, or any other reason. They are all excuses. Once you accept this, AVRT will become much, much easier.
Think to yourself
"IT is lying, IT wants that deep pleasure. Too bad for IT, because I never drink."
This is also a good time to re-state your Big Plan, which has five words, just like your hand. Try saying them once per finger, so that when you get to "never," you send a fitting message to the SOB. If you have any doubts as to who is in control, wiggle your fingers, then stop and look at your hand. Challenge the Beast, over which you are supposedly powerless, to do the same.
Think "OK, mighty Beast, if you can wiggle my fingers, I'm going to get loaded real good." Of course, IT won't be able to do that, which should remind you that the Beast (addictive desire) is a quadriplegic, and cannot do anything without your consent. You are in charge.