Sounds like he's not the only one nursing festering resentments Babe.
Again - if you spend this energy focusing on YOU, you'll get much farther, much faster.
Al-Anon isn't there for the things you think it is - it isn't about explaining addiction or how to live with it. It's not about YOU at all in fact.
I want him to understand the disease better for my son
This is your responsibility, not his.