Learning to feel pleasure in myself
I’m very new to realizing that I am codependent. With my new awareness, I see the little parts of my life that can bring me pleasure if I allow it - if I decide I deserve it. I have an ABF whom I do not live with; however, I see the same patterns in the single parenting of my 2 sons. I’ve been scared to death since their birth that they won’t feel love so I indulge them and serve them. My home is their home. I am starting to take space for myself even if it’s just a small thing like playing the music I like or putting on headphones to block out their noise. I didn’t really do those things because “what if they need me and I don’t hear them”? They’re 11 and 14 - they’ll find me if the house is on fire. I’m making them serve themselves more and do what they’re capable of. I’m even looking into redecorating my bedroom so I love my space.
I’m grateful for This awareness. I think my life is about to get a lot better.