Welcome!
So glad you found us, 3trees. All of us can relate to your experience and feelings.
This is a great community, filled with compassionate people and a lot of hard-earned wisdom. I recommend you look around, read the "sticky" notes at the top of the forum and keep coming back every day.
Change is possible! You don't have to feel the way you did after that family event ever again. It is in your power to stop and create a better life for yourself and your family. Joining in here is what helped me turn the corner; you can too.
I've not had any alcohol since last May and life is so much better in every way. You have no idea how much alcohol contributes to and even CAUSES anxiety.
Here's my intro and story if you'd like to take a look:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...rate-stop.html (Wine drinking woman, desperate to stop)