Originally Posted by
golfinmidwest 
Yes I want to work harder at this and stop these issues I have. Day by Day.
There is value in learning to
Surrender. Give that some thought. Also, if you have a Big Book, read it often, and if you need a Big Book you can get them on line at aa.org or at most local AA groups.
Attend some meetings, remember to follow directions, as it is pretty impossible to recover following "your own plan". I had to leave behind my flawed way of living and try something else. I only had to change one thing, everything! Also, relax, there are a few folks who have gone through what you are, just different locations and people, but they mostly recover in a very similar fashion. Abstinence is the only must, the rest of it is growing into a way of life that is based on love and service, good luck to you, One Day at a Time,
PS, I am originally from the Kansas City metro area. Lots of great golf courses there!