Ok
Been a heavy drinker for about 10 years now. Like most people battling alcoholism, I have quit drinking more times than I can count. I seem to quit for a week or two, go to a couple meetings, and then boom, back to my old ways.
I am a few days shy of my 37th birthday, and I honestly think I will not see 40 if I keep drinking the way I have been.
But whats driving my decision is not really health related, though I am 20 lbs overweight.
Really, I am just tired of my life revolving around alcohol.
Tired of being hung over until noon.
Tired of spending time alone, drinking, concealing my drinking.
Tired of waking up the next morning figuring out what I did the night before. Tired of taking a 20 minute shower to shake loose the cobwebs
Tired of lying to my parents that I have quit drinking so they won't worry
Tired of looking like I drank a fifth of Vodka the night before, cuz I did.
The last ten years have been a blur. Nothing really accomplished. I mean, its tough to do anything after 8 vodka tonics, except watch TV, or rewatching the same movies. Last night I watched Gladiator for the upteenth time, because its a fun movie sauced. Real productive evening there pal!
So I am going to a meeting tonight. I have been before. I can only imagine when I walk in, people will snicker "He's back". But I don't care. I am the point where I really don't care about much anymore. Alcohol has a a funny way of doing that.
Has anyone ever done the 90 meeting in 90 day thing? I am thinking about doing that. To be sober for 90 days would really be an accomplishment. Hopefully after 90 days being dry, I can see how much better my life has become.