You are all so right. And even as I sipped, I knew It. In my head I was focusing on my disappointment in myself.
Avoiding situations where there’s alcohol isn’t an option for me. I need to pony up, get stronger, and be brave. The struggle of the AV whispering that “you’re fine, there’s no problem here” sucks. In my mind, while I may not have progressed to a level where it’s affecting my life in a major way, doesn’t matter. The fact that one week and 2 days ago I risked myself, others, and a friendship, is enough for me to know I need a change.