I have a slightly different view of this than others.
You all sound pretty young.
How much do you talk about real stuff?
I felt like my life became all about my drinking and my Ex's ultimatums which was counter productive. And he refused to see any role that his nasty controlling abusive behaviour might have in the whole thing.
You sound like a really nice guy who loves your wife very much. There may be a moment when tough love is the only love, but for now I would really try to see things from her perspective.
What is making this beautiful woman want to self destruct?
What I needed was for someone to help me find the way back to me. No one did, but I found my own way. Then I quit. And it was easy.
But I needed to want it, to control my choice. But my Ex could have helped me by trying to see what was driving the problem instead of focusing solely on the effect of the problem.
This is not to say that she can solve the rest and keep on drinking, but it does mean that talking a look at the big picture can help her stop.
But that is harder than just focusing on the drinking.
I wonder if attending couples counselling where her drinking was included in the discussion would be an idea if she is willing. This would need to be in addition to to her separate sessions.
She needs to know that you are on her side, and that you are there to help, truly help, including understanding what role you play in the picture. Even if its not easy to hear.
In the end it is up to her, but you can help her find her way to that place.
Again, she clearly needs to stop. But I know people who have been able to make this a team effort, rather than a firing line.
Not an easy balance to walk. And it may not work. And she may still lie, but less.....and when she does you may be able to talk about it.