Onmyhighway

So a little background on myself before we get started, my name is Chris, I am 28 years old and from North Carolina. Recently married in october of 2017 and also bought a house that same month. I have read several stories on here and thought it may be a little liberating to tell mine, so thanks in advance for reading and or responding.

I was charged with a dwi and open container, along with a few traffic infractions that caused the initial stop back in june of 2016. My case was finally settled about a week ago and I plead guilty to dwi and the subsequent traffic violations were dropped. This has given me a mixed bag of emotions, but we will circle back to this after the story of my dwi, and my coming to terms with the thought of being an alcoholic.

So I guess the starting point in the story is several years before all this when I decided that there was nothing wrong with having a few beers to relax after a long week. This quickly transferred into having a few after a long day and then transitioned into having serial just because beers during dinner. After a few years of this I never would have thought of myself as am alcoholic because I could wait until days off work and would also generally only drink in the afternoons or at night. Fast forward a few years and you will find me every night I'm not at work taking a 12 pack home, finishing it and then deciding whether I should go buy some more or not. I learned that there are 2 bad things that happened to me after drinking. One was that after so many I only wamted more. The second was that after having more I always found myself needing to be or go somewhere else. To say that I got caught my first time driving drunk would be a lie.

So me and some buddies decided to have a going away party for a friend. This decision came following me already having killed my first 12 pack of the night. So after deciding it was happening I got in the truck, bought more beer and was on my way. After making it to the site there was quite a bit more drinking. And finally a decision was made to go ride around on the farm some. After several minutes of that it turned into lets leave and go find some grub. This is about 1 in the morning, and things get a little fuzzy here as I was quite intoxicated. After leaving we are on our way back towards my house on a road I have driven a thousand times probably. There is a point where the speed limit lowers and I decided I didn't have to. Was clocked at 41 in a 25, this was the first ticket. After seeing blue lights and i realized life as I knew it was over, I failed to realize the light I was going under was red. This was ticket number 2. As the officer approached the vehicle I could tell this was not going to go well. As soon as I opened the window he started asking about the odor of alcohol and also about the open beer can in the console. About 2 minutes later I was out of the vehicle and performing or more correctly attmepting the field sobriety test. Long story short I failed miserably. After this the cuffs went on and I was taken to the local police department for a chemical analysis. I blew a 0.17 the first time and 0.15 the second. Luckily the officer was quite polite, he did issue a citation for every curable offense he could but it didn't go without cause. He did not elect to take me to jail and at 4 in the morning I was released from the magistrates office to make the humiliating phone call for my mother to come pick me up. The next few weeks are also a blur as it was like living in a dreamscape. So during this time I was able to stay employed, keep my drivers license and in essence live my normal life out. Now fast forward a liytle over a year. Having gone back to being comfortable my drinking habits quickly picked back up and again I was behind the wheel while obviously not in a position to be. Ended up at a point where I was almost involved in a crash and was fortunate enough to not have that occur. This was the second time I had to take a good hard look at my drinking and decide if it was a problem. Decided it was and took actions to change it. Stopped for a little while and slowly started back to having a few to loosen up. This is kind of where it stalled. Then came my final court date and conviction. Was convicted of the dwi with everything else being dismissed. Had a really good lawyer and was thankful for him walking me through the process and setting realistic expectations. He never once told me I would get out of it but instead talked me through what I should prepare for, although I was in no way expecting or trying to get out of it. I was willing to accept my consequences for the crimes I committed and for the people I put in danger that night. His honesty and straightforwardness is what made me decide on him as my counsel. So in circling back to the mixed bag of emotions about this situation being resolved in court anyways. So first off I am so glad to be at a point where I can move forward with getting through the legal hurdles and feeling like this is going to be behind me soon enough. The bad part of this is that I am required to have an ignition interlock and as such was not able to stay employed where I was at. So after just buying a house unemployment is a very unsettling thought. But I found myself stressed and thinking "man I could really go for a few cold ones". I haven't drank in about a week and a half. Doesn't seem like much but to me it seems like a pretty good while. What scares me is thinking that having a few would help ease the stress of what having a few caused. This has opened my eyes that my drinking is a problem and as such I am attempting to move forward with sobriety.

Sorry for such a long post. Maybe somebody will read it and connect. I look forward to being a member here and moving forward with this chapter of life. Thanks.