40 days... Wow, a few key things that seem to be helping, disclosure to the few close friends i have, the realization of the futile nature of so called 'social media' and deletion of account on the most widely recognized one, stepping up my performance at work, during off time leaning into music whether my own playing or working with someone who's asked to be taught (also decline of an invitation to play with someone whose been problematic), family connection(s) making myself available and open, a doctor's appointment addressing some physical issues, regular exercise and focus on diet, a normal amount of sleep, picking back up more intellectual interests of books, independent film and online lectures.
yes i do still find myself considering using, i dunno if that feeling will ever stop completely...
i'm living with it for now
=^,^=