It was fear that started my alcoholism and fear that stopped it .
Let me explain . As a teenager I was anxious and shy and discovered that alcohol relieved this feeling and gave me confidence and made life more fun . Given that anxiety is born out of fear and alcohol took away that fear temporarily, the cycle of needing alcohol to feel better had begun and continued for the rest of my life . A strange thing eventually happened though and that is that at some stage alcohol started to actually cause the very fear that I had all those years ago and now that I am sober the only real fear I have with regards to alcohol is of what it will do to me if I start drinking . I am terrified of going through the misery that alcohol eventually brought me in later life . So , the very substance that gave me confidence all those years ago and made me feel good would now probability destroy me .