When she goes away for work I just start drinking. And I dont stop until she gets back.
So the reason you don't drink when she is around is because you don't want her to know how much you drink.
Here is the next step in the alcoholic progression.
You start drinking more when she is around (because you need to) but you become incredibly creative (and sneaky) with how you pull it off.
You might, for example on the social occasions when she drinks get a head start by chugging a few shots of vodka. Or you might have a "night cap" after she falls asleep. Or you might start drinking alone in your car on the way home so you can start your buzz alone. There are countless methods alcoholics devise to disguise their drinking. And it gets harder and harder to hide it.
And ultimately, the only one you fool, is yourself.