Originally Posted by
Numblady 
Can you get professional advice just for you? My uninformed guess is that you’ve enabled him mightily and will need trained and neutral support to reprogram your thinking. You didn’t say...are you sober? Is he?
yes, I was. i should of know better. it didn't register until we went to therapy that I found out I was enabler. yes i am ,he is 6m sober.