Clover71

Just want to vent a bit I guess.

I know I probably shouldn't be feeling guilty, but I am. It's been kind of a tough week in my head. I got home from work last night and had a couple of glasses of wine while having a very much needed phone conversation with a friend. My son, who was off school sick yesterday, kept interrupting the call and finally got mad and said that I'm always on the phone (which I'm not). Mind you AH husband was passed out on the couch. I finish my call and come inside. AH wakes up by then and is in the kitchen. My son starts crying hysterically. I ask him what's wrong, and had missed his concert at school. I was so busy that I had forgotten about it, and probably didn't think about it because he was off sick. Then he said I might be able to make it if we leave now. Well, i was beat from my week and had two glasses of wine. There was no way I was driving anywhere. Of course he never asked AH in all that time. He doesn't know about AH'a drinking, I think they just don't go to him because I'm usually the one doing mostly everything.

I asked AH to try to console him, and he handled it all wrong making it worse. He is getting worse in this area as well. Bad week and terrible night all around.

So, here I am today and AH is working 7 days this week again. I know he must be tired, but I'm tired too. (Note I'm glad I don't have to deal with him being here - im so full of contradictions ) I love my kids more than life, but I don't want to even be a mom right now today. Just hearing the word "mom" called from the other room makes me want to scream.

I feel like I let my son down, and I feel bad for being so irritated by the kids.