Traumatic bonding in regards to DS, now age 11.
I don't speak much about my youngest son because it's not my place to be telling his story... yet today I feel it may be helpful in many ways to share a bit of the framework of his recovery from traumatic bonding within our own core family, and my FOO.
It's been a journey for him, as much as for myself and my husband. We've learned how to honor his emotions. To allow him his voice. To let him work through and process the GOOD and the BAD...
As I was able to give DS the gift of space away from his own father/my husband when he was in active addiction and dry drunk,it also has been allowing an easier healing and reconnection now that his father is in recovery.
DS has had support for several years from Alakid/Alateen/Alanon. He's also received more recent counseling from domestic abuse help centers, as I've received my own counseling and therapy in different rooms at the same time. To know we aren't alone and receive guidance from others who've been through this has been HUGE.
The longer we have been away from my parents and any contact whatsoever with them, the healthier we both have been.
DS is missing them much less and his take on the dysfunction pops up once in a while with no prompting and no comment by me. I let him have his voice without directing it.