Hi 914born
Get some help rehab, doctor, medical professional, make a plan and make the change.
We are all here to make and support changes to our life, many are at the beginning of the path some have years of experience and others decades.
You have come to a great place for support.
Dig deep buddy and make the first step because no one else can do that for you.
Grab hold of as much help from the medical profession as you can.
YOU CAN DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!