Hi, Damnit.
Welcome.
I’m sorry for your situation, but glad you found us.
I don’t have answers for you, I’m afraid.
I can tell you that your story is not uncommon.
We are all over the place emotionally in early sobriety and sometimes it takes every ounce of resolve we have to stay in recovery.
How about takinga couple of steps back from the relationship?
Let him work his recovery while you take good care of yourself, maybe read around a bit about alcohol dependence/addiction.
I would also suggest Al-Anon, a group for people affected by a loved one’s drinking.
There is lots of support and understanding there, and lots to learn.
Time will tell as to where your relationship does or doesn’t go.
Good thoughts and hugs.