2 years sober but still fell like an outsider
I got through December check! Did I want to drink.. truthfully no! 😊 what what I did feel was intense loneliness.. my husband still drinks, his social life hasn’t changed.. mine is non existent. I have friends who I make all the effort with because no one can seem to have fun without the booze.. so I tag along to meals out and bars but it’s not the same once everyone drinks and I just want to go home but then I’m alone again. Does anyone else have this? I thought me not drinking would make for a closer truer marriage but all I feel is a void. I speak to my husband but he doesn’t have a lot of empathy, I I try to get him to do things with me like walk our dog along the beach then get some chips etc.. but he’s rather play golf and finish off in the club house. He says I focus on him too much to solve my isolation.. forgive me but I thought that’s what couples did?? So I look to friends those I had left after my alcoholism killed off most.. I have 3 people I can txt and meet with .. but they all drink and I hear about nights out they have had through Facebook.. god I’m fed up! Rehab told me life would be beautiful once sober, it’s been like a smack in the face with a spade, I’m loney, I’m left out, I’m feel like I’m an outsider.. I don’t know what to do to change.. also please don’t hate but I really can’t stand AA it’s brings out my anxiety. Anyone here in same boat or experiencing similar emotions?