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Hiya Sohard ~
I'm glad you found a bunch of us Recovered Folks in this SR niche.
My brief Back Story is that I started Drinking [and Drugging] in College, and carried on with increased Drinking right through early Retirement at age 48 some 16 Years ago. As of next Month, I quit w/o Relapse 4 Years ago. After quitting, I found SR when I was looking for on-line support. I read the RR/AVRT Slides on-line that a Mentor here made me aware of. RR put structure to what I call
The Quit Decision.
A common realization throughout SR is that the resolute committment to walk away from Drinking comes from within. It is not typically an externally-imposed dynamic. I likened it to a Heart Pacemaker. I wanted to carry around my Sober Committment within, and not be tethered to 'something' external. I deserved Sober Freedom; not just a transference of my Addiction. Therefore,
I achieved that Sober Freedom.
The Devil Is In The Details, for many. That is, develop
your Trick Bag re: what Social Situations you're comfortable with, and that are positive. Or not. Me, I still avoid small House Dinners where I'll be the only non-Drinker. I just can't be bothered. Around me, my Wife of ~40 Years has quit Drinking. Then, there's Sports. Concerts. After-Work FACs all need your Boundaries invoked. Many of us work up glib standard answers as to why you don't drink Alcohol, or why you'll be opting out of a sotted Camping Weekend. Developing and rehearsing your lines takes a load off awkward Invitations until Sobriety becomes The New Normal while the roaring AV lessens over time, with repetitive practice. Boundaries 101. Certain activities, and Friends that are Friends only because of past Drinking, might have to be shed. Not a bad thing, I found. Getting Sober coincidentally makes some 'Friends' self-conscious about their own excess Drinking.
There's all kinds of Recovery 'givens' that didn't ring true for me. That self-driven Recovery is somehow 'White Knuckling', or 'going it alone'. I liked SR because of the brutal truth allowed by anonymity, and the large number of POVs that transcend any F2F Meeting. I'd check SR while in line at the Grocery, or before Bed. Just to get a lil burst of new thinking, or to see how someone was doing. SR is also a great Resource for assessing who has the sort of Sobriety
you want [or not], and what Toolkit they're working to achieve that.
My Brain was my biggest Asset to Recovery after a few Weeks Sober. No, I wasn't 'all normal' after 2 Weeks. But, as SR Members and Mods also have attested, my thinking started to normalize some as my daily Intake over Years of a ~Liter of Vodka had rinsed out of my System. Further, I was big on 'Distractions' to help change Routines. Posting here. Taking PIctures. Hiking with our Dog. Working House Projects, since I designed and built this Solar House myself before I sobered up. Whatever individualized Steps it takes...
I live out now in what I call 'The SoberSphere'. At the Dog Park, or at RV Parks while traveling about, I meet loads of Self-Recovered Folks as we drift into varied topics. Indeed, I've met and now hired 2 Handymen here in the Rural West who are working off their DUI-related expenses. Typically around $10,000-. So, regarding your question, I also circle back here to SR to see if I can contribute a little by referencing the larger Reality outside pre-Recovery.
My latest epiphany is to understand and respect my own Genetics-based Introversion. Avoiding the stress of 'too many' People in person was critical to my own permanent Recovery. Read some here about how 'we're' wired. Trying to force fit an Extrovert-oriented Recovery Program onto me would have closeted me back into Drinking. With a fatal Outcome. The single, most-critical State now for this kinda-Introvert to achieve?
> Serenity <
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~ Why Introverts And Extroverts Are Different ~
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