ashamedagain1

I recently went through a break up and I turned to alcohol ..... truth is alcohol was part of the reason we split but I never chose to admit it .... I get violent and I lie and I make really poor choices when I’ve had a drink and I always hate myself the next day and vow I’ll change ..... I’m even missing work now and it’s got to stop ..... I work hard and am a goof mum ..... when I’m not drinking..... it robs me of precious time with my kids because my anxiety keeps my hiding in bed all day while I wallow in self pitty the next day.

I don’t drink in the day and I don’t drink everyday but I’m drinking enough to realise I’m not the let’s go for one drink kind of girl ..... I’m the two bottles of wine later falling out with everyone then passing out kind of girl..... at least 3/4 times a week now.

The worst thing is I usually don’t remember what’s gone on the night before and am so ashamed.

I don’t want to lose my kids and want to be the best version of myself for them ..... I’m gonna do this as if today .... day 1 ....

Thanks for reading x