Today is day one.... I made two days, and was feeling great yesterday.... so I went out. My town has about 10 liquor stores - there is no way to go anywhere without facing the temptation. I feel so weak (mentally) and like garbage (physically)... I'm laying in bed, achy, tired, and angry that I have to go through this again, after I was feeling better and I really thought I was done.... and then I went and did something that incredibly stupid. I started playing with fake blood and probably ruined my favorite shirt.... went to a former friends' house when I should NOT have been driving, but most of all, lied to myself and my husband because I said I was done. I don't know why I keep doing something I don't even want to. I'll rest up more tomorrow... Thursday I have therapy (thankfully) and I will feel better.... just have to avoid temptation, which is everywhere.