Lonely and lost
I am having the worst night I can remember having in a very long time, and it actually involves very little quacking or AH anger. It seems like it's all coming down at once, and at the moment it's too much for me to handle. Our oldest is having some pretty big, but not too uncommon young adult problems and is making some school/work decisions that could affect him in ways he is too immature to realize. I should have a partner/husband/co-parent to discuss and worry with, but his 10 second contribution was antagonistic at best (fortunately it was only said to me), and then he went to bed. So, here I sit alone. Not sure what I should be doing, if anything. But I am aware that I am very, very alone. I need sleep. AH gets some test results back tomorrow, that I'm fairly certain won't be positive news. I'm going to need the energy to deal with what comes from that, but there's no way I can sleep with my current anxiety level and non-stop tears. I knew parenting would be tough, but I didn't sign up to do this alone! It keeps amazing me that I am almost never physically alone, but I am almost always alone.