Originally Posted by
Sohard 
I know you're right about my having problems with the acceptance part of this. I accept it the day after a night of hell (like last night) and for days afterwards, but then I start questioning it. It's just so stupid. I'm smarter than this. Agh! The cycle!
It's got nothing to do with intelligence - it's a state of mind really. I firmly believe one needs to have a plan in place to fall back on each and every day. Especially at first, so that when you "question" your addiction you have a group of people, a set of rules or a concept to always fall back on. Have you considered finding a local support group in addition to using SR?