Ok, so I suppose this is a good thing? All of a sudden I can't stop crying. I don't remember the last time I cried. I suppose because the alcohol numbed me so much it was impossible to have that emotion. It is an incredible sadness but not a depression. Just feeling like happiness will never be in my life again. If I can stay sober and keep my job and house I will be successful. But it makes me so sad. I don't get on Facebook anymore because I can't stand to see other people happy, going places, doing things. I don't think I will ever have enough money to do anything, just keeping my head above water is a daily struggle financially. So I am finally crying.