Hello!
Let me first start by saying that after reading through some of the threads, I know that I'm not alone! As korny as that may sound, I didn't realize how many of you are in the same boat as I am! Thanks, it has helped a lot!!!
Ok....where to start!!!
I have been married for just under a year. I went into this marriage knowing the man I was marrying was an alcoholic; I guess I just didn't realize just how hard the journey to recovery would be. My "A", (hey, I'm already learning the lingo!) has a family history of alcoholism and drug abuse. His father passed away when he was six from a heroin overdose. And his brother is an addict as well. So this disease is in his blood. He has been on and off the "wagon" as he puts it for about 6 months. My A is a binge drinker. He doesn’t drink everyday, but when he does, he goes overboard. He gets aggressive (not physically) and his personality changes dramatically. He has 2 DUI's and unfortunately has not learned his lesson. He has tried several attempts to quit on his own, only to wind up right back at square one. I believe he has never wanted to stop drinking for the right reasons, only to please me. And that lasts only so long. So here we are once again. He had his most recent binge this past weekend and all the same issues surfaced. The lying, the covering it up, the excuses. I lost it this time. I couldn't take it. I asked him to leave, and told him that he needed to figure things out on his own. I have been as supportive as I can. I stopped drinking to help support him, tried to get him into counseling, etc. I didn't know what else to do...
Since then (Sunday to be exact) he has gone and talked to several counselors, been going to AA meetings, and says he's REALLY going to do it this time. He's going to do it for himself, Etc, etc, etc. I WANT to believe him. I want him to come home. I miss him, but as so afraid that we'll wind up going down the same road we've gone down so many times. I don't know what to do. I haven't given up on our marriage, but this is my defense mechanism, to push him away. Am I doing the right thing?!?! Is throwing him out of the house the WRONG thing to do? He has hurt me deeply.
Your advice would be greatly appreciated!
