Originally Posted by
Akasha 
In no shape or form do I underestimate your addiction. In a way I think you are dealing with so much more... alcohol is something that is freely and legally available any and everywhere you go which in my mind makes it so much harder to stop. All I have to do is delete a few numbers off of my phone and this madness stops. Sounds easy enough right? Why can't I do it then???
I think letting go of a lifestyle, something you are used to is very hard, even when continuing that lifestyle will eventually lead to bad outcomes. At least you know what to expect. It's comfortable, even if it's deadly. It's almost like uprooting yourself and moving to a different country with different cultures, expectations, etc. IMHO, fear keeps us stuck in dangerous routines. Gotta move past the fear and take a leap of faith and believe the change will be a good one. It' REALLY HARD, but many have done it. Your about to break old unhealthy ties and create new ones. Hope you stick with SR. We are all here for you. John