I'm so sorry. My husband is in rehab right now but I am making plans to make sure I will be OK if things don't work out. When I read in the Al Anon stuff something about how I don't have to pay the consequences for my husband's drinking, it was kind of an epiphany. I didn't even realize that I have a choice in that. So, I choose not to and I just need to make sure I am in a position where rather than it being a goal, it's an achievable reality. That doesn't mean I am planning to leave him but when I realized what an epiphany that one little thing was, I realized I kind of have some work to do.
I am so sorry you are struggling. I am definitely struggling as well but today is not a bad day so that's excellent. Tomorrow? Can't say.