Nola, I too see the folks here as heroes. Decades later I still remember that "jaw dropping" pain. I called it excruciating-glow-in-the-dark pain. It is still one of the hardest things I have ever done and I didn't have kids with my qualifier.
I went for a long time where every day I gave myself credit if I just got to the end of the day without calling him nor killing myself. Yep it was that bad.
Soldiers, policemen/women, doctors, teachers serve our country but in tangible ways I believe those who quit drinking or leave a relationship with an addict make society better in less tangible but perhaps more powerful ways.
Thank you for doing the right thing (I know leaving isn't the right thing for everyone). Peace, healing, and courage to you and all who are in this situation.