Stayingsassy

Ah, here it is, well into the second week and needing to address that six pound weight gain since quitting. I remember one stint of sobriety lasting 3 months and I gained 50 pounds. Another sobriety adventure resulted in a 30 pound gain. I started drinking after my stint in rehab so I could lose weight. It worked, unfortunately, because the fallout from alcoholism was pretty bad too.

Weight gain causes my relapses. All of them. My weight never "evens out" with time, this is just another big problem I've got. Apparently ex alcoholics in sobriety often find themselves dying early from diabetes, so much that I've read articles from addiction specialists issuing caution to alcoholics to take care not to cross addict with sugar.

So since relapse is not an option, this week I put down the jelly beans (trader joes has the best ones), the kit Kats, the lollipops, the milk chocolate, the caramel popcorn. Yesterday I had nothing sweeter than a bit of fruit and dark chocolate, one corn tortilla with dinner, so carbs under 100. Sometimes I'm not sure if I crave alcohol or sugar more, it's just continuous craving at this point.

But I still go to AA every day, there's my gym workouts, and instead of food deprivation I choose to see it as a nutrition and cooking project.

Thanks for letting me vent...sobriety is work and I'm gutting it out.