Hi Kelly,
It sounds like you've been through a lot. Congratulations on making the decision to stop drinking and to start posting here. The people on this site have been invaluable to me on my recovery journey. I recently started cognitive behavioural therapy and learnt that I have a core belief that I am worthless. Apparently it can be quite a common belief held by us addicts. The good news is, we can change the way we view ourselves. We can get better. Sobriety has given me the clarity to start working on the stuff that made me drink in the first place. I'm learning that sobriety is so much more than not drinking. It's about reconnecting with the real, authentic me and building a load of self-esteem in the process.
At 32, you have lots of time to work on your recovery and build the life you want to live. For now, you need to concentrate on staying sober. One day at a time. You could think about joining the September class thread on this site and I find the 24 hour thread really useful. I like checking in every morning and committing to another 24 hours of sobriety. It sets the tone for my day. When you get a craving, post here. There will always be someone around who can help.
I'm sending you lots of strength and support. And take heart that if you managed 94 days on your own, now you have a whole army of support. Things can and will get better
