Oh, I know SC. My ex fiance is in the same position - he has lost 2 (!) fiancees and 1 business partner in less than a year (and 1 PC and a router (2nd fiancee threw them in the bathtub)). In addition, he has 2 ex-wives, a son he barely sees, debts up to his eyeballs, few (?any) friends, lives in a rented house (most of his furniture is stuff I left), drives a beat up car and is struggling to pay an interim tax bill due next month. I just did our accounts today - we earned nearly $90k each last year. Where does all his money go? Can he not see what a mess his life is in?
OK, that was my bit to show you that I totally understand. Now, for my rational head. He is an alcoholic. He doesn't think like I do. He is making choices, just like I am. He has every right to live in whatever way he chooses. I don't like his choices, so I don't share his life. If he wants to drink himself to death - his choice.
It isn't worth wasting time trying to understand. I have spent a lot of time trying to work it out. In fact, I am still intrigued by the psychology of addiction but that is for my own curiosity rather than to help him.
Some alcoholic's bottoms are if they see themselves drunk on a video, for others it is when they are in the ground. No-one knows where theirs is until they reach it.