Have you been to Alanon meetings yet?
I kept trying to get my husband to AA, but I had no idea what I really needed was my own recovery program. Alcoholism is a family disease. We have resources for our own recovery, but that requires reaching out and continually looking for new, healthy, healing therapies for ourselves.
It wasn't until after taking my own recovery seriously, that eventually my husband embraced his own recovery.
Alanon is a "worldwide fellowship that offers a program of recovery for the families and friends of alcoholics, whether or not the alcoholic recognizes the existence of a drinking problem or seeks help."
https://al-anon.org/al-anon-meetings...-anon-meeting/