I'm not going to say that your stellar performance while drinking was all in your head, but I am going to suggest that this part is:
Originally Posted by
notgonnastoptry 
Why am I duller and not interesting as a sober person?
You don't have to live up to your negative perceptions of yourself...you can exceed them. You must exceed them. Being miserable in sobriety is our
addiction's cruelest trick, not the universe's.