Hi, just checking in. Day 38. I'm struggling with health stuff but not without hope and options. I'm just lying around. I'm at my sister's place alone. It's nice here. I should be making calls. Usually I'll come out if this within a couple of days and get some stuff done. Then I have to continue to live on vegetables and meats and nothing else. That's until I clear some issues. I called the life coach yesterday and got some good advice when I was feeling hopeless.
Yesterday I said 'screw it. I'm gong to drink. I feel awful no matter what.' Then I started thinking of detoxing all over again and my family that is helping me and that was the end of it. I turned the car around and starting thinking about coming back to see the dog. Came back and that was that. It seems like my AV attacks last about 10 minutes which isn't even long enough time to a bar before the rational side takes it down. Detox again??? Oooffff. I don't want to drink anymore. I just want to get out of my own skin. That's what I crave. But nothing except another drug is going to do that unless it's exercise or something. I have access to plenty of Medical Marijuana in the neighborhood, and I'm not touching that stuff. Noooooo way.
My Location and house are paradise, I wish I was feeling good enough to enjoy it. But I'm better than many and should improve.
Check in later, Viper.