Sasha,
So sorry you're going through this. It took me seeing my parents, particularly my Dad, who passed many years ago, as humans who make mistakes just as we do rather than parents in order for me to forgive past transgressions. Just because they are "parents" doesn't make them infallible. Heck, I'll go far as to say some people never should have BEEN parents (this may include yours).
I think so many times we put our parents on pedestals as these figures who should do this and that, but it just doesn't work that way. Once I Knocked that pedestal out from underneath them, things were a lot easier to deal with.
I hope you find Peace with what you are dealing with. Just remember you don't need their validation in order to make your memories real. They are YOURS and they live in YOU every day. YOU need to find a way to get past them, as unfair as that is, and somehow reconcile them in order to be whole and move on.
Lots of hugs.