Originally Posted by
Sunflowerlife 
2:28 pm Maryland
Relaxing with some silence in the background, for once, as my toddler takes his blessed nap.
Feeling really disconnected this week- tired of the binge eating- tired of letting my life pass through my fingers all based on how I feel about my body. I want to release this deranged thinking for once and for all. I feel like I'm missing out on so much and it's all because of my disordered view on my body and what it means. In reality, it means nothing. How I look means nothing. So why do I put so much pressure on myself to be thin and look a certain way? I can't live this way anymore. I haven't been to the pool in over 2 weeks. I cancelled a fun day trip with a great friend because I had binged the night before. What kind of life is that?
Did a nice meditation a little while ago and some journaling- had my lunch and now I'm not sure what to do with myself. I am a bit lonely honestly. Can't wait for my parents and sister to get back from their vacations. It's been 4 weeks already.
Congrats to those celebrating today and my love and thoughts are always with those struggling.
Please dont be lonely Sunflower. You are not alone. I feel totally the same as you. Years of pouring spirits mixed with gallons of coke down my neck has turned my once ok body into an overweight horrid shell. The sugar cravings have not helped lately. But small steps. We are amazing for telling the alcohol poison to pee off. We can sort out the rest one day at a time...just like we do the drink. We can encourage each other. I've been saying for weeks that I am going swimming....or jogging. Instead I have binged on Netflix. We can name a day...when we both have an hour or two...do some exercise....and report back here straight after....and give each other a pat on the back. Ready for it Sunny ???😀😀 xxxx