I hear you - going through pretty much the same period now. I would like to blackout...but without alcohol being involved.
What can I say?
Can't come up with anything better than a platitude "This too shall pass".
Platitude as it is, it's true.
There were hundreds, if not thousands of moments in my life when I felt hopeless. Then after some time I looked back and realized that the situation worked out somehow.
Get out somewhere. Go for a walk. Hit the gym. Anything to get yourself out of your head. You don't have to live in your thoughts right now. The fact that they are attacking you doesn't mean you have to listen.
If anything, stay here and post.
Remember, you are not allowed to drink until at least three members give you permission to do so.
Cheer up.