Wife of alcoholic
I just saw my husbands alcoholism 1 month ago. When this all stated 5 monts ago he would argue with me and leave the house, all my gut feelings came true when I discovered he was having an affair. The alcoholism was certainly going on for years and I didnt see it, I was just confused as to why he had an affair and was telling me he wasnt in love with me anymore, said he never really was. He moved out and refused counciling, said we were over, he wanted me to let him go. said he didnt care if he lost his business, his house or anything, he just wanted to jump on his Harley and go where ever he ended up. Said he tried the father thing and the marriage thing and had changed as a person and why should he honor a vow he took 16 years ago. One night he invites me to dinner and asks if I want him to come home, I said yes, more than you know, with counciling. We g to counciling and he says the same stuff, how he wants to be alone and how he only came back because I asked him to. They realize after the rest of the meeting what te problem is and ask us to come to counciling seperatly. At my session she says "Oh boy, he is a severe alcholic" When he comes home from his he cries and says I know I have a drinking problem, says he knows he has to quit but is afraid he cant. he had also gone to his MD the same day (Who I had written a letter to) and says the Dr. is also sure the drinking has lead to his health and emotional problems. He is referred to a physciatrist (hasnt seen him yet) Next day he says he will cut down but wont give up drinking socially. Next day lies to m about where he is going and comes home drunk, says he was with George, he wasnt. Hasnt said he loves me in months. We have been intimate. I tol him if he only wanted to come back because I wanted him to he could leave and file for divorce, he says he doesnt want a divorce. I dont kno how I am ging to deal with the lying and cheating and the affair. Could it have only been because of the alcohol? Do some alcholics womanize ? He never once made a crude comment about another woman or so much as looked at them in an inappropriate way in my presence before. Do you think he wont say I love you because he knows I wont put up with this behavior for too long and doesnt want to open up to me because he is afraid of failure?