Same
CghhvhjjhhQUOTE=KennedysMama902;4230438]Hello all!! Let's start off by saying that withdrawal is just pure torture. If I would have known about withdrawal before pills, I can almost assure you that I would have never touched one. I am on day 9 of no pain killers, although I have taken adderal for a few days but done with that as well. The painful part is over, but I am now finding myself to feel VERY weak. My arms feel as if they are 100 pounds, and it's very hard for me to stand up for longer than 5 minutes. I want this to be over, and I kick myself in the ass for ever letting myself get this way. I have never been one to not be able to control my life, or actions, and in all honesty I didn't really realize I had a problem until one day I just wanted to have more money in my pocket and stopped. Man oh man I had no idea what I was in for.
Well, my name is Jessica and I am 24 years old. I graduated from a very good rated high school in 2008 and I have a 2 year old daughter who is my main motivation through this terrible but amazing journey. I come from a very close family, and very old fashioned, (on my dad's side) and no one on that side has any idea of my addiction. My moms side of the family is pretty similar to myself and what I'm going through, and I have been currently living with my mom for the last year, which is when the addiction started. I took pills every now and again before moving in here but it was never to the point where I NEEDED them. If I didn't have them, I didn't care. I knew my mother had a pill addiction but never realized how bad it was until I moved in. A friend of the family would bring her 30-50 pills at a time and my mom would pay her later. That's when my problem started. I started doing the same thing, getting 10 or so pills and paying her later, which eventually turned into getting 30-40 pills at a time just like my mother would. This is scary. I NEVER imagined myself to become or to be an addict, but accepting the fact that I was has gotten me through this recovery process.
The main thing that is making me feel so weak and helpless is not having energy. I work 2 jobs, have a 2 year old and some days I work 18 hours a day. Tomorrow will be the first day I will work with no adderal and no pills. I'm scared as to if I'm going to make it or not. I mean I know I will, but damn this is going to SUCK. I know for a very strong fact that I will never relapse because I do not wish withdrawal on my WORST ENEMY!!!! Does anyone have any easy, safe ways to get some kind of energy?? And does anyone know how long it will take to feel normal again. I don't think 10 months is a super long time for addiction, but what do I know? Help!!!!! I want my life back and I want it back fast!!!![/QUOTE]