Hi there, glad you found your way here. This forum has been extremely helpful in my journey with my AH and I think you'll find it very helpful too. The question isn't whether he meets some defined definition of what an alcoholic is. Yes, he doesn't wake up and drink but bottom line is it's creating a problem in your marriage and you aren't okay with it. You've set limits and asked him to cut back and he can't do it. I think it's safe to say that there's a problem and he needs some help. I'm sorry you're in this situation but you made a good choice by posting here for help and advice. I know it's hard to take it but eventually I believe you will know what you are supposed to do with this.