Welcome and thanks for sharing. FWIW - my suggestion (a very very strong one) is to stop now. Your mind can start to clear a bit and you can see if it really is too much to work in a bar. I say this as a dedicated AA-er and someone who went back to the restaurant world serving at 5 1/2 mo sober (I am almost at 17 now and am just taking a few weeks to decide if a diff resto or position in the industry is what I should go for). IMO, it is possible to work in any job or industry sober, if you choose to.
You sound like you haven't made up your mind to quit drinking or not. I know from my own experience that I HAD to stop in order to address my health issues (liver, gut, etc) and heal.
Best of luck- there are lots of resources here and IRL that can help.