Originally Posted by
MLD51 
I can't remember for sure, but somewhere in the 6-7 month timeframe. I had a lot of legal crap to deal with, and once a lot of that was over, the cloud sort of lifted for me. Plus I was done with outpatient treatment then, and working the steps in AA pretty hard at that point. I just remember sitting on my deck, and thinking that in the past I would have had a glass of wine or a beer with me, and instead of missing that, a feeling of such peace washed over me, because I realized that not only had I not thought about missing the wine, I was really HAPPY to not be drinking. I knew that I had turned a corner of some sort. Of course, your mileage may vary. But I do hope you get to that point - it's a good place to be.
M, this is pretty much exactly where I am at. Over 6 months, with about 3.5 combined months of in/outpatient treatment, sponsors, doing the steps, dealing with the legal.
I honestly think the difference or the shift for me was realizing that I really could stay sober NO MATTER WHAT. There was no pull of relief or enjoyment offered by the temptation of drink anymore because I have walked through a lot of hard stuff in the past year and I have spent the first half of this year sober.
I remember going to the water park with my little girl. The big pool was closed, but the slides, kiddie pool and hot tub were open. It was a sunny hot day. I remember looking up at the sun sitting just barely in the water of the kiddie pool and thinking, this is just bliss.
No annoyance at the renos, all the people there, the annoyed lifeguards having to babysit other people's kids, not being able to go down the slides cuz my lil one was too scared, lol.
Not watching the clock, jonesing for my next drink and watching the 5 minutes increments drag by like hours.
For me it was truly committing to sobriety- not just quitting drinking, but living a healthy life in recovery, that I realized I was giving myself freedom, opportunity to experience life for real again.
That's so awesome tealily and I am really glad you enjoyed a wonderful sober vacation.
