Originally Posted by
ButtersTheBrave 
I've been browsing these forums a lot over the last few days. I came knowing that I don't know what to do this time, but I think I have something that will work.
I realized that nowhere in my IOP program, AA meetings, anywhere else did I actually explicitly state I will never drink again. I'm taking that part of what I've found in the 'Rational Recovery' angle (a bit tacky of a name IMO). It was interesting how viscerally writing down I WILL NEVER DRINK AGAIN AND I WILL NEVER CHANGE MY MIND made my insides scream. Ha!
For anyone else reading this though I only think this method will work at this stage of my sobriety because I am not actively physically addicted and I have a lot of tools to make life manageable. I have enough buffer to actually take my life back. I wouldn't have a year ago.
I will still continue my counseling and participating in this forum to deal with all of the problems that I tried to escape using alcohol.
BTB,
Congratulations on writing down and seriously considering taking the pledge of permanent abstinence. Maybe you've really done it. You do have every capacity to do it. As you continue to recognize within you that screaming resistance to your pledge, you also have the perfect capacity to catch yourself and NOT act upon that desire to drink some more. Yes, every single time.
Having that old internal desire is not a sign of poor health or disease, but acting upon it is simply no longer appropriate for you, and with permanent abstinence in place, it does gradually extinguish over time. People break habits all the time, and I've found making an irrevocable pledge is the easiest (and most common) way.
You found Rational Recovery, which allows addicted people to tap into the Mother Lode of all recovery methods - Pledge to quit for good and keep that decision pristine and separate from everything else that you do.
Rational Recovery also developed the technique called Addictive Voice Recognition Technique. It is what some people use to keep the pledge separate from everything else in their lives.
GT