i deal with the same issue myself. Absolutly no idea why my wife stuck around. No idea why she sitll sticks around. and many times i've thought she'd be happier without me etc..
BUT
It also goes the other way too. I also often think geeze she must really love me to tolerate all this and so on. Like damn i'm really fortunate to have someone whos gonnna go through thick and thin with me etc.. not everyone gets that or finds that.
The reality too is no ones perfect we all have our flaws etc..
hang in there!