Originally Posted by
jenniehsh 
Question: As his ex, what is the balance between creating the space I need to heal from this relationship but also ensuring he gets the help he needs? What exactly should I do?
I would really appreciate hearing what others have done in cases of wanting to help but also needing to protect yourself.
I think its hard to end a relationship and heal if you are still involved with the person. There is nothing wrong with encouraging treatment and its not enabling (that is when you do things to encourage continued use and unhealthy lifestyle) But the process can be long and emotional, and truthfully I think it will leave you feeling still attached to him. I went through it with my husband and I can tell you there were a lot of ups and downs before he found treatment that worked for him. It can take a good chunk of time, and the person has to be willing to keep trying. This is why I think it would be very hard for you to heal and keep your own life moving forward (meeting someone new). I think a happy medium would be to do what you have done. Give him a few suggestions of where he can go for help, share your concern with his family members if you think they can be a support system for him. If your religious, then add him into your prayers. Try to remember that you broke up because it was an unhealthy situation for you.