Hi okietiger,
Congrats on your 3 months Sober. Thats the keyword I think "Sober", sorry your having a tough time, but I know that if I pick up things will only get worse not better, how about you?
Hang in there and do whatever you can to keep on one day at a time. Do you have face to face support? If so, why not make good use of that.
Thinking of you.
nogard