My heart sank when I read your post, John.
Please stop drinking and apply for that volunteer position. I think that you would be a great fit at the animal shelter and that it would be a great way to spend your Summer.
Alcoholism happens to the good and the not so good alike but I personally believe that you are far too good a man to flounder among the seas of this awful disease. Pick yourself up and put drinking aside for good. Do whatever it takes to set recovery permanently in place for you.
Treat John the way that we would treat John if we could.