Dear Endof the Day,
Please hang in there.
Why not use the holiday to make yourself feel better rather than coming home with a heavy sack of guilt and a cloudy mind? This could be the opportunity for some healthy walks or a run, or a swim, or the chance to read a good book (‘Let’s take the long way home’ by Gail Caldwell is a great read and pertinent to us), or visit some historical place wherever you are going. I am sure you will find tons of things to do if you put your mind to it.
A quick note: I don’t know how your social life is but mine was the power suit crowd who liked their drinks tall, strong and ever-coming. “Get this guy a double Greygoose, lotsa ice and little tonic, and a few slices of lime, pronto, chop-chop!” was half, and I am not exaggerating, literally half the conversation at the table.
A few weeks back I was back at one of those gatherings. When the famous words were shouted, I said no thanks. I had to say it three times before it registered and it was like a chilly air descended at our table, everyone frozen and staring at me. Total silence. What? Really? What’s up? I blurted some lame excuse, that was the best I could do. I am recovering from a flu and still have to take antibiotics for a couple of days.. Whaaat? F--- that, it doesn’t matter, and blah, blah. Man, it was not easy. And then I saw the unsaid responses in their eyes, like how dare I? Judging, accusing and not at all happy…
So this sobriety of recent also gave me the added benefit to realize that these so-called friends, whom I have known for decades literally, were simply drinking buddies, and bad ones at that. Happy to be rid of not one but two demeaning activities in my life.
Sorry to rant, but that’s what we are here for right?
Also:
I have a personal interest in your sobriety since your quit day is one day before mine. I am on day 37 today. Every day you make it to the end of the day is an inspiration for me. I hope we make it to a day 40 together and then to 100 and eventually post our 1-year anniversary one day apart! Wouldn’t that be great?
Hang in there!
Best to you,
T.